心中永远的痛

我们输了~
真的输了~
以前我们还一直希望我们能忙到年中~
但现在~
唉~
这么早就得空了会很不习惯~

每次一想到就会很难过
我已经尝试看综艺节目让自己哈哈大笑
但看完后
一想到又想哭了

当天我就已经做最坏的打算了
但没想到真的发生了
当然伤心的不只我一个人
我队员也很伤心
他们比赛前就放了很大的希望
很有自信的说
他们一定要赢
可是。。。
注定的了

其实在那里时我真很忍着不想哭的
可是当唱生日歌给他听时
看着他眼眶含泪
要哭出来时
我不经抱他一起去旁边哭
Wu...T.T
我一面安慰他
一面哭
身为队长的我
也安慰他起来了
粉红在后边也哭了起来
我想对一个生日却有这么不好的回忆的他来说
应该是种打击吧
好难过的生日哦

回到家
一想到又哭了
自己一面哭一面自责
我不是一个很好的队长
既然破坏了我们的历史
我很失败
真得很失败
则么会这样啊！
我们练了这么久
竟然是这样的结果
我对不起
清海，子毅，伟雄
他们牺牲时间
教我们
但我们却让他们失望了

早上起来
整个很闷
失去自我了
不懂要做么
做任何事都没有心情了
功课不想做
设么都不想动
只要尽量让自己不去想
很乱 很烦

我要怎么面对将来呢
怎么面对大家
我真得不懂
我只想和队员们一起痛快地哭
我只想队员们能摆脱这伤感

虽然大家会说只是个比赛
但
他对我们来说的意义重大
比任何东西都重要！
我不知还要不要留下
还是选择离开
我真得不懂
希望时间能冲淡一切
但绝不可能消失在我们的心里

唉~
真是我们心中永远的痛
队员们
加油吧~！

歌词COOL~

就在感情到了无法挽留，
而你又决意离开的时候。
你要我找个理由，
让你回头 可最后 还是让你走。
你说分手的时候，就不要 泪流。
就在聚散到了最后关头，
而你又择意忘记的时候。
我也想找个借口， 改变结局
可最后 还是放了手。
你说分手了以后，就不要 让自己难受。
如果你真的需要什么理由，
一万个够不够。
早知道你把这份感情 看得太重，
当初说什么也不让你走。
如果我真的需要什么借口，
一万个都不够。
早知道我对这份感情 难分难舍。
当初说什么也不让自己放手。

新年的假期

今年的新年感觉上很压力~
因为一想到开学又要忙回了，
很讨厌那种感觉~

所以呢，
我下定决心去外婆家一定要玩个够~
结果，
也玩得太够了~
因为每天都玩麻将到半夜三四点~
-。-（星期六也就生病了~）
哈哈~
可是哦，
总觉得外婆家已经没有以前那种气氛了~
可能是因为表哥表姐大家都长大了~
外婆也去世了~
没有小时候那种感觉了~
唉~

要开学了咯~
很讨厌！
可是没办法~

刚刚去看了他的blog~
不大喜欢看他的blog的~
不知做么，
每次看了都很妒嫉~
因为他都写别人怎么带给他快乐~
可是我都做不到~
我觉得我很失败~
为设么人家能做得到
而我却不能呢~？？
我要怎样才能让大家留下一个美好的回忆呢~？？
我真的不懂！
算了！
我想我能做得也只有这样了~


person who hate busy life --- nick@_@teh

许久后的中四感言~

哇~
很久没有写blog了叻~
灰尘很厚了！
-_-''
嘻嘻~
唉~
真的好久没有开电脑了~
中四真得很忙~
其实也没忙到哪里去啦~
只是因为有比赛的练习，
所以比其他人都还忙~

显哦~
不够睡~
每天都半夜才睡~
真的很讨厌这样的生活！
最近幸好新年要到了，
有九天的假期，
让我能放松一点~
不用这么忙~
可是一想到开学，
我就显掉了~
要面对学业，比赛的压力~
学业---面对新的东西很怕不能跟上~
比赛---我们的目标和野心都很大~（怕失望也会更大~）

比赛呢~
我们真的希望能创下新的纪录。
（虽然有点怕怕和没有信心啦~）
比赛是我在中四最大的希望了（除了怕跌班）
如果不能赢的话，
甚至提早退出的话，
我可能就不会再呆下去了~
妈也心疼我太忙，
不要我参加st john了，
要我退出~
可是我告诉她我可以的~
如果不幸及不希望的事情真的发生了，
我就必须离开了~
但这只是可能~
不一定~-_-

最近也因为太忙没有时间想别的事了~
是件好事啦~
如果让我想“更多”的事，
也许我会更压力，
更难过~
如果这些事能让我忘了。。。
那我宁愿忙一点~
因为我知道是不可能的~
不可能再发生了！
真得很讨厌这种感觉~
很讨厌很讨厌！
已经不可能了，
为设么我还想着这事呢~
时间能让我证明我是可以忘了这事的~
加油哦~
''=''


新年了咯~
是个崭新的一年了~
希望这一年能顺顺利利，
开开心心~
大家平平安安哦~
新年快乐！

eXaM & cOmp3TiTiOn~

saturday--->
st john exam~
bt duno y tat day i nv nervous at all~
last year when i took asas,
i was quite nervous~
bt tis year...
ha3~
nvm lor~
jz take exam lor~
tat day i bcum clever ady~
i took the number in fron wan~
so tat i can finish faster~
cz last time nursing course,
i was so stupid~
i took number bhind~
wait til so long~
bt luckily tat day exam shun li lar~
gt few person fail...
haiz~
bt lastly madam oso let them take again lor~
huh~
nasib~
n they pass lor~
after exam,
dad cum n fetch me~
i help him work~
tat day reli veli tired~
bt nite i 1am sumthg oni sleep~
cz i watch futbal~
hehe~
next day gt 2 go 2 kl 4 competition......

sunday--->
i woke up 5am~
cz bus bertolak at 6am~
tat day although was the
mental & arithmetic(xin suan) national & international competition~
bt i nv nervous oso~
i went thr relax~
relax~
cz i noe i surely cant gt any prize wan~
international leh~
so susah 2 gt~
bt nvm~
i wil try my best~
i nv practice at home 2~
cz 2 buzy~
haiz~
90% dun hav chance liao lar~
so i jz did my best~
tat day were veli veli sat~
it was lk olympic~
every wakil from others country hold their own country flag,
walked slowly 2 the stage~
wow~
suddenly i gt olympic feel~
wakakakaka~
i saw a lot others country flag 2~
bt some duno wat country wan~
hehe~
after a lot of big big ppl gav speech,
competition wil begin soon~
when the whisel start blow,
beeeeeep!
we turn over the paper n start answer~
i jz do n do n do~
after 8 minutes,
beeeeep! again~
mean finished~
i turn over the paper~
bt stil saw 1 boy stil doin~
wakao~
nt fair!
bt nvm la~
small boy mah~
let him do lor~
i saw the contestant in fron was quite a pretty gal~
she n her fren i think they did more than me~
i say in heart,
''no chance liao lar...''
cz gt ppl did more than me~
although is jz a few question bt did more 2 mah~
haiz~
suak lor~
nvm lor~
after finished competition,
we gt 2 wait 4 the results~
walao eh,
wait til so long~
our teacher heard ppl say n told us tat,
tis year persaingan veli veli kuat n standard grown up 2~
so they nid more time 2 mark n tetap who wil gt prize~
wow~
i lagi noe no chance liao~
actullay b4 i cum 2 competition~
i cum wit veli veli relax~
i nv think tat wil bring a trophy bek~
cz i noe lagi dificult grade lagi little chance~
bt nvm lor~
ady register jz take lor~
while waiting veli xianz~
last yrs gt senior play wit us~
tis yrs they sitting spm exam~
cant go wit us lor~
i was so tired~
(cz last nite sleep 4 hrs oni...)
so i sleep~
bt when i woke up,
stil haven reach the results came out,
n is proceeding lucky draw~
xianz~
wait n wait n wait~
wait......
when 3pm sumthg oni start giving prize~
start from lower grade~
we were higher grade,
so gt 2 wait 4 them 2 finish lower grade 1st~
haiz... jz wait lor~
when reach mei mei turn,
we go in fron of the big screen 2 c her results~
every yrs she wil gt cz she last time lower grade~
bt 2day ooops,
dun hav her name~
she cried~
haiz~
saD~
i think is every yrs she gt n tis yrs nv gt,
she cant except~
i jz an wei her lor~
after her,
is our centre another gt hope wan~
she oso din gt~
haiz~
no hope liao~
all high grade wan finished liao lar~
3 of us gt 2 person din gt liao~
after my turn,
i say in heart,
''no nid c liao wan, surely dun hav~''
bt suddenly i saw my name~
i terperanjat~
i look n look again~
wow~ unbelievable!
gt my name~
i gt 4th~
of course happy lar~
i jz go 2 the stage n took trophy from a man from India wan~
ha3~ nice~
i think i m nasib wan la~
bt my teacher n fren n laopo told me tat,
ntg is nasib wan,
is bcz u gt 'shi li' oso~
i jz listen lor~
bt i stil feel tat lucky wan~
aftertat finaly we can go home~
in the bus,
i play wit all the others children~
they were so cute~
in the journey bek,
they alwayz stick at me until we reach melaka~
i was so tired playing wit them bt i stil veli veli happy~
cz they reli cute~
tis is reli an un4gettable kl journey 4 me~
finaly exam n competition pass~
can relax a bit liao~
huh~
ha3~

nIcK@_@tEh

喜欢一个人好累

''暗恋喜欢一个人好美 　
想像你轻轻搂我的肩 　
走在人挤人的街
抓紧你的手甜蜜无限
暗恋喜欢一个人好累 　
流泪在数不尽的黑夜 　
想念变成了习惯 　
想你一遍遍你却好远
如果你不当我是朋友
而是其他重要的角色
是否我就可以占有
你每个笑容''
那天我在caDet caMp听到了这首歌~
原来老婆也喜欢这首歌~
以前我就听到了，
就非常喜欢了~
想到这首歌~
觉得喜欢一个人真的好累~

我该放弃了吗？
放弃一个没有结果的幻想~
我不想再想了~
可是每次都不能不想~
脑袋里总浮现这件事~
唉~
怎么办？
能教教我吗？
我该继续下去吗？
还是该放弃了呢？
我觉得我真的不能了~
我该放弃了~
我一直弄了许多东西来麻醉自己~
希望自己能忘了这件事~
啊~~~
好吧~
我决定了！
放弃吧~
不能再想了~
有人告诉我不容易~
可是我相信我能！
在这个假期里~
我一定要忘了他~
加油！
我一定能的~
明天会更好！
耶！
希望大家能幸福！
^_^

nIcK@_@tEh

cAd3t cAmP

juz nw i jz came bek from malim...
we wash tent thr...
so happy...
wakakaka...
cz we play water n
our group wash at least 5 tent leh...
wow!
so excited...
when i washing tent,
i m thinking bek wat had happen during the camp...
actually 1st day i m so excited n cant wait til tat day,
cz my group members were so gud n i can easily campur wit them...
so i cant wait til tat day liao...
so 1st day morning we were so tired...
we carry luggage to the campsite,
den nid 2 build tent,
aftertat summore gals wan cook n
lastly nid 2 arrange our luggage here n thr...
wah...
so many thg do...
especially build tent...
so so so so susah n tired...
huh...
after tired the whole day,
nite we gt a special game...
tat is nite walk...
b4 we go,
camp commander told us tat they went in the 4rest b4
n they met, saw n feel gt ''gud brothers'' inside...
actually i trust it...
u noe...
ning ke xing qi wu mah...
tat nite my group members n i gt a bit wu hui n bu shuang...
cz they wan me teman them...
bt guang ming they all cal me 2...
so i m so wei nan...
bt finaly i chose guang ming they all...
n my group members angry me..
they suan me til 2day...
walao..
haiz...
suan liao lo...
den b4 goin in,
we gt 2 close our eye...
after waiting 4 so long,
we 4 in a group walk into the 4rest...
i n my lao po gt yuan fen...
we were chose 2 be in a group...
during the journey we talk...
lao po hold my hand so tide...
bt bcz gt others fren,
i nv feel anythg n walk normally...
bt the next day chee yee asked us tat
''do u all feel tat during the journey,
gt ''gud brothers'' bside the oil bowl...?''
we say no arh...
bt he say he n others ajk can feel it...
walao...
my hair all came up man...
so terror...
2nd day my group members n i gud bek...
we play n so happy...
we took exam 2...
1st exam,
actually we cheat...
hahaha...
bt we curi curi la...
ajk oso close 1 eye lo...
wakakaka...
den tat nite we were so nervous...
cz gt dancing competition...
bt we wil without james...
cz b4 tat he cut his hand...
haiz...
so saD...
bt nvm lor...
he jz bcum director lo...
haha...
yong teck help us do the cd gt problem...
den we dance til half no music lo...
2nd time oso lk tat...
bt we stil dance finish...
n i veli thx yong teck 4 the cd 2...
during the dancing,
i did quite a lot mistake lo...
haiz..
den aftertat gt bbq...
kena my group members suan lagi...
they thought i wan wit my gud frens summore...
i so saD sampai nak cry...
bt i stil bbq n tat nite was so tired,
so after bbq i straight slept...
next morning means the last day...
we goin bek...
bt b4 tat...
we had a cooking competition...
we cook veli fast...
n my responsibility is cook the lemang...
actually i duno hw 2 cook...
bt luckily gt guang ming help me...
n after cook finished...
sir tay n camp commander try our dishes...
when sir tay eat our lemang,
we say veli nice...
wow....
i m so so so so so so so happy...
cz tis is my 1st time i cook lemang...
den after cooking competition finished...
reach the time 2 giv prize b4 we go bek...
1stly is the best cooking...
we gt the champion jz bcz of my lemang...
wahahaha...
so happy...
the best dancing...
the 3rd group summore...
wow...
marvelous...
james n i teach the dancing steps wan...XP
the best female camper...
katherine...
yeah...
our group wan...
the best male camper...
deng deng deng deng...
is nicholas...
is me...?
i cant believe it...
actually during the journey 2 the camp...
my group leader told me tat i should show out my talent...
so tat others can c...
mayb jz bcz he saw i gt talent...
wakakakaka...
jkin la...XP
starting i duno wat is he saying...
i loh...
bt i jz listen lo...
bt nw i knew it...
hehe...
aftertat..
the best patrol...
is...
the 3rd group!
yahooooooooo...
so hapi...
haha...
lastly the best patrol leader..
i noe surely is our group leader---joevine...
cz he lead us so gud...
he everytime say xiao lv xiao lv....
den summore wat...
emmm...
when nid 2 high muz high...
when nid 2 yan su muz yan su...
wahahahaha...
he gt so many ''gud sentences''...
n we learn up all...
wakakaka...
bt he is reli a gud person...
so lucky we met him...
tat day we were so happy...
sang song in the bus...
n finaly we gt 2 go bek...
haiz...
3 days 2 nite so fast...
i m so happy 2 go 2 tis camp...
i learn a lot of thg...
reli!
n i agak agak cn gt 4 new badges 2...
haha...
i hope tat our group members frnship wil 4eva...
n we promise wil alwayz cum out meet each other veli soon...
i noe a lot of new frn 2...XD
kk...
write til here...
hope st john wil bcum more better...
area 1 st john 2...
gambateh jiayou...
gambateh jiayou...
(my group member taught me wan...)
hehe...
bb lo...